CHAPTER NINE
More of Toad's Adventures
The next morning Toad woke up very early. He had been dreaming about being back at home in Toad Hall. At first, he was surprised to see that he was in the forest. Where was his nice, warm bed? But then he looked at his maid's clothes. He remembered everything. He remembered how he had escaped from the jail. He remembered how the police had chased him. But then he remembered that he was free! Toad felt very proud of himself for his bravery and courage. He stood up and immediately walked away.
The sunshine was warm and the birds were singing. Toad felt wonderful. The only problem was he didn't know how to find Toad Hall. He hoped to see some animal that would tell him the way to go. Soon Toad found a small road and followed it. Then he saw a little canal that was flowing next to the road. Toad walked along the canal for a while, hoping to see someone. Soon he saw a large, strong-looking horse walking toward him. The horse had some thick ropes tied around his neck. He was pulling a large boat in the canal. A large, fat woman sat in the boat and was guiding it through the water.
"I wonder if the person on the boat can help me!" thought Toad.
"Good morning, lady!" said the woman when she saw Toad.
"Hello, madam!" said Toad. "I suppose it's a nice morning to you. But I'm in serious trouble. You see, I have a daughter who's married. She wrote me a letter, asking me to come and see her immediately. So I ran out of the house, because I was very worried about her. You might understand, madam, if you're a mother. I've left my business of the day. You see, I have a clothes washing business. I have three young children at home, and they're probably getting into trouble. I have no money, and I got lost in the forest. But I must see my married daughter. Oh, what a terrible day!"
"Where does your married daughter live, madam?" asked the woman.
"She lives near the river, close to a fine house called Toad Hall," said Toad. "Maybe you have heard of it? I think it's somewhere close by."
"I'm going in the direction of Toad Hall, so I'll give you a ride on my boat. Climb in," said the woman. She guided the boat close to the land, so Toad could step in. As Toad sat down in the boat, he thought, "How lucky I am!"
"So you wash clothes, madam?" asked the woman as they traveled. "That's a very good business."
"Oh, yes! I have the best business in the country," said Toad. "All the rich gentlemen in the area give me their clothing to wash. They won't go to anyone else, because I know how to wash their nice clothing perfectly!"
"Do you do all that work yourself?" asked the woman.
"I have twenty girls that work for me, but it's still difficult. You know how young girls are these days! They're so lazy!" cried Toad. He was having fun.
"I certainly do!" said the woman loudly. "I'm sure you make your girls work very hard though. Tell me, do you enjoy washing clothes?"
"I love it!" said Toad. "I'm always happiest when I'm washing clothing. But of course, it's so easy for me, because I'm so good at it!"
"Then how lucky I am to meet you!" said the woman. "It's lucky for both of us."
Toad was a little nervous. "What do you mean, madam?" he asked.
"Well, I have a bag of dirty clothes over in the other corner of the boat. They need to be washed. My husband usually works with me on this boat. He guides the boat, or takes care of our horse. But he's gone today. He went hunting, to find a rabbit for dinner. So now I have to guide the boat, and I can't do the washing. Will you do it for me, since you're so good at it?"
Toad was worried. If only he hadn't talked so much! "Oh, don't worry about the washing," he said. "Just think about that nice rabbit your husband's going to catch. Do you have any onions? They're very delicious with rabbit meat."
"I can't think about anything but my washing," said the woman. "I'm surprised you're talking about rabbits. There are clothes that need to be washed! Now, the clothes are sitting over there, in that corner of the boat. There's also a bucket with some soap and water. You will have fun, since you like washing clothes. And it will help me."
"Listen, why don't you let me guide the boat?" cried Toad. He was very worried now. He didn't know how to wash clothing! "Then you can wash the clothes yourself. I only wash gentlemen's clothing. It's my special skill."
"I can't let you guide the boat," said the woman. "It's very difficult. Besides, it's boring work. I want you to be happy. No, you can wash the clothes, and I'll guide the boat."
Toad saw that he had no choice. So he got the bag of clothes, the bucket, and the soap and water. "Well, I suppose anyone can wash clothing. It's probably easy!" he thought.
However, thirty minutes later Toad was still washing the clothes. They wouldn't become clean! Toad kept looking at the woman. He was afraid she would notice how badly he was doing. But every time he looked at her, she seemed busy with the boat. His back hurt badly. Toad said some bad words. Then he dropped the soap in the water for the fiftieth time!
Suddenly he heard the woman laughing loudly. "I've been watching you this whole time," she said. "I thought you couldn't be a washing woman. You're too vain. And you don't know how to wash clothes. You've never washed anything in your life? Who are you, anyway?"
Toad was very angry. "You stupid, fat woman!" he shouted. "Don't talk to me like that! I am a toad. I am a very well known, respected, and wealthy toad! I might look like a washing woman, but I will not be laughed at!"
The woman looked at Toad very carefully. "You are a toad!" she said. "A horrible, ugly toad. I don't like toads, and I don't want them on my boat. Come here!"
Before Toad could do anything, the woman had grabbed him. She lifted him up and threw him off the boat into the water. Toad landed in the water. He had never been so angry at anyone in his life! Quickly, he swam to the shore and got out of the water. He began to run after the boat as fast as he could.
The woman laughed when she saw Toad running along next to the boat. But Toad didn't pay attention. He wanted revenge! Suddenly he knew what he wanted to do. He would steal the woman's horse! First he ran and caught the horse. He untied the ropes around the horse's neck. Then he jumped on its back. He kicked the horse to make it run. Now the woman's boat wouldn't move in the water. Laughing loudly, Toad rode away. The woman was shouting, "stop, stop!"
"I've never heard those words before!" said Toad as the horse ran.
The horse was not able to run for very long, and soon it began to walk. Toad did not care. He thought he was very clever to steal the woman's horse. He was happy to ride the horse slowly through the countryside.
Toad and the horse had traveled for some miles. Suddenly, Toad saw a man sitting by the road. He had built a fire, and he was cooking something in a pot. Suddenly Toad realized how hungry he was. He hadn't eaten anything in two days! Toad got off the horse and walked slowly towards the man. He wondered how he could make the man give him some of the food.
The man stared at Toad for a minute. Then he said, "Do you want to sell that horse?"
Toad was surprised. But then he began to think about it. If he sold the horse, then he would have money, and perhaps he could make the man give him something to eat! "Well, I don't know," said Toad. "I like this horse very much. I don't think I want to sell him. I need a horse to carry my things."
"Why don't you get a donkey?" asked the man.
"But you don't understand. This horse is special. He's very fast and strong. He's the best horse in this area! Many people want to buy him, but I always say no. I won't sell him, but I'm curious about something. How much money would you give me for him?"
The man looked at the horse. "I'll give you four coins. One coin for each leg," he said.
"Four coins? Oh, no. That's not enough money. This horse is worth much more than that!" Toad said.
"Well," said the man, "I'll give you five coins for him, then. But that's my final offer."
Toad thought about it. He was very hungry and still some distance away from home. The police might be looking for him. Toad remembered that the horse hadn't cost him any money. At last he said, "Listen here, man! This is what we'll do. You give me six coins for the horse. Also give me some of that food you are cooking. It smells very delicious, and I am very hungry. Then I will give you this wonderful young horse. If that offer isn't good enough for you, just say so, and I will leave you. I know a rich man who also wants to buy this horse!"
The man said that six coins were too much, but he gave Toad the money anyway. Then he reached into a bag and pulled out a bowl and a fork. He gave Toad some of the food. It was a thick soup, with many kinds of meat and vegetables. Toad thought that it was the best food he had ever eaten. He kept asking for more. When Toad had eaten three bowls of the soup, he got up and thanked the man. Then he said goodbye to the horse. Fortunately, the man knew the area very well. He told Toad how to find Toad Hall.
Toad walked through the fields. He was feeling wonderful, now that he had eaten. His clothes were dry, and he felt big and strong. As he walked, he thought about all his adventures. "How smart I am! How brave I am! I escaped everybody," he thought. "No animal is better than I am. My enemies put me in jail, but I escaped. The police chased me, but I disappeared. Unfortunately, I was attacked by an evil, fat woman. She threw me into the water, but then I stole her horse. Then I sold it for money and an excellent breakfast. How amazing I am! I am the handsome, popular, wealthy Toad!"
Toad felt so good that he began to sing a song about himself. He sang it as he walked. He felt better and better every minute. But Toad was about to have a terrible surprise.
After walking for a couple of hours Toad reached the main road. He was walking along the road when he saw something coming towards him. It was a car!
"This is more good luck!" Toad said. "I will make the drivers stop the car. Then I will tell them the same story that I told the woman on the boat. Then they will offer me a ride to Toad Hall. Perhaps I will end up driving up to Toad Hall in a car. Won't Badger be surprised?"
He stepped into the road to wave at the car. But suddenly he felt very afraid. His heart was beating so fast that he fell down. This car was the same car that he had stolen! And the people in the car were the same people he had seen in the restaurant!
Toad lay on the ground and thought, "Oh, no! They'll recognize me and take me back to the jail! Oh, how stupid I am! Why didn't I wait until night time? I should have gone home quietly, instead of running around in the daylight!"
The car stopped in front of him. Two men got out. They walked around Toad, who was lying in the road. One of them said, "Oh, no. This is very sad! Here is a poor old woman. The heat must have made her ill. Perhaps she has not had any food today. Let's drive her to the nearest village. I am sure she has friends there."
The two men gently lifted Toad into the car. They made him very comfortable. Toad soon realized that these kind men did not recognize him. He felt braver. He opened his eyes and looked around him.
"There, she's awake now," said one of the men. "The fresh air is good for her. How do you feel now, madam?"
"Thank you very much, sir," said Toad. "I'm feeling a little better."
"Just sit still, and don't try to talk," said the man. "We'll be at the village soon."
"I won't talk," said Toad. "I just had an idea. May I sit in the front seat of your car? There is more fresh air in the front. I might feel better then."
"What a smart woman," said the man. "Of course you can!" So the man helped Toad to sit in the front seat. Toad sat in the front seat and felt the cool, fresh air. He looked at the man who was driving. Suddenly Toad had an even better idea. He really wanted to drive that car again!
After a few minutes Toad said, "Please, sir, may I try to drive the car? I've been watching you, and I think I could do it. It looks very easy. I would love to tell my friends that I had driven a real car!"
The gentlemen laughed. "I like this idea!" one of them said. "We'll let her try driving. I'm sure she will be careful."
So they stopped the car and let Toad sit in the driver's seat. He was very excited. Toad began to drive the car slowly down the road. The men were amazed. "Look what a good driver she is!" one of them said. Toad drove a little faster, and then even faster. Suddenly he was driving very fast. "Be careful, madam!" cried one of the men. This annoyed Toad. He felt very powerful. "I am not an old woman!" he cried. "I am the Toad, the strong, powerful Toad! Sit still, and I will show you how good a driver I am!"
Suddenly the men realized the truth. "He is the toad who stole our car!" they cried. "Grab him! Take him back to jail! He's a crazy, dangerous animal!"
One of the men tried to grab Toad. Unfortunately, he should not have done this in a moving car. Quickly, Toad turned the steering wheel. The car ran off the road. It hit some bushes, and then it fell into some thick mud! Toad's body flew through the air and landed in some soft grass. He lay there for a minute and then slowly stood up. He saw the two gentlemen sitting in the mud. Their car was sinking quickly.
Toad was not hurt. He began to run away as fast as he could. After he had run for about ten minutes, he stopped to rest. Then he began to laugh. "How clever I am! I escaped them once again. And I got to drive their car for the second time. Is there any animal more wonderful and amazing than I?" And Toad began to sing another song!
But suddenly he stopped singing. There were three policemen running towards him as fast as they could!
"Oh, how stupid I am! Sitting here and singing vain songs about myself. Now the police are going to catch me again!" Toad cried. He began to run. Unfortunately, Toad was a fat animal, and his legs were short. He could hear their voices behind him. They were about to catch him!
Suddenly Toad began to fall. Then he landed in very cold water. He had run straight into the large, fast river! The river's current began to carry him away. It was hard for Toad to keep his head above water. Toad was also not a very good swimmer. "If I can just get out of this river, I'll never touch another car again!" he cried.
Suddenly he noticed a large, thick tree branch hanging over the water. Toad grabbed it and held on. It was very difficult, but he pulled himself out of the water. Toad hung onto the branch. Soon he climbed onto the land. He lay there for a minute in the dirt, feeling exhausted. Where was he now?
Then Toad noticed a large hole in a hill that was next to the river. The hole looked familiar. As Toad watched, he saw an animal come out of the hole and look at him. The animal had shiny brown hair, whiskers, and a long tail.
It was the Rat!
(end of section)